THOUGHTS TO PONDER REGARDING MARRIAGE...
I'm curious what you think of some of these short quotes taken from a book I'm almost finished reading called, "Created to Be His Helpmeet" by Debi Pearl. I'll keep the quotes short as I know some of the longer ones can be kind of boring to read.
Page 20
"A good marriage, just like anything worthwhile, takes doing the right things every day...every hour...every moment."
Page 21
"If you are a wife, you were created to fill a need......You were created to make him complete, not to seek personal fulfillment parallel to him."
Page 30
"Never demand that a man love you and cherish you because he ought do. Earn every smile and shared moment."
Page 33
"God's will is for a wife to have a merry heart, a cheerful countenance and a glow that will refresh the most stressed and tired husband on the planet. Bubbling cheer goes a long way to maintain or even restore a marriage. Make a decision right now to break the "poor me" habit. Today, put it down as sin and rebellion, and then tomorrow wake up with joy in your heart and home."
Page 34
"If you have reason to be hurt or discouraged and yet you sing with thanksgiving, this is a true sacrifice of worship to God."
There will probably be more of these thoughts to come as these were only from the first 2 chapters! The book is excellent in my opinion and really made me think about how I treat Evan.
5 comments:
Hi Terri!
I somewhat disagree with the quote that wives shouldn't demand to be cherished. I think this is somewhat counter to Ephesians 5, where husbands are commanded to love their wives "as Christ loved the church." Yes, we shouldn't verbally demand to be cherished, but on the other hand, it's God's expectation of husbands, so we shouldn't necessarily have to "earn anything."
Thanks for your comment, Becky. I was really hoping for some opinions on these. :) I knew they would be somewhat controversial. I think her point is that we should make sure we are doing our part regardless of whether or not a man is obeying his command in Ephesians. I sure appreciate your thoughts! Thanks for sharing!
More thoughts on your comment, Becky...
As I was thinking about this more, I realized the importance of Debi's context surrounding this comment. (And probably others as well...) Therefore, pulling comments out of her context is bound to change her original intent somewhat. (Sorry I didn't think about that sooner.) I guess I was just hoping to portray a taste of what she offered through some little blurps.
She does make the comment in her book that if her husband were talking, he would be talking to the men about loving their wives, but since it is her, she is strictly talking to the women about our role. I know she agrees with the "husbands loving their wives" command. If her thoughts intrigue you, I would recommend reading the book as a whole. That might put things together better. They are very reasonable priced at their website. (See my links for No Greater Joy.)
I'm with Becky about the Eph. 5:21 and the command for husbands to love their wives. Women need to think less about this part and more about their command to respect their husbands. Easy to point out flaws in others!
I also disagree with the excerpt from page 33 - "God's will if for a wife to have a merry heart..." We weren't made to be happy all the time (read many of the psalms -David isn't happy by any means and still in God's will). If we remember the Catechism #1 - What is the chief end of man? To glorify God... so that said, I'd say that God's will for a wife is to glorify Him whether she's having a rotten day or not. Of course we should strive to have a cheerful countenance. As Christians we have the greatest reason to be cheerful of anyone!
The Page 21 quote is very good - too often I see a husband and wife running parallel to each other, never connecting, but thinking they're so "in sync" because they're personally filled from outside the marriage.
My thoughts on Sara's "merry heart" comment... From my own experience, I know that when I'm grumpy and having a bad day, it's usually a result of sin in my life -- selfishness, anger, bitterness, etc. I am learning that I need to die to these things daily. I believe it IS God's will for us to have a merry heart, but it's our own sin that keeps us from experiencing that joy. Joy is a fruit of the spirit which we will bear when we are connected to the vine. (John 15:1-8) Also, down in vs. 11, "I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete."
I do agree it's God's will for us to glorify Him, even in difficult circumstances -- yes, even spilled milk, cranky children, and a messy house! :)
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