Aden's birth has been very special to me for more reasons than just the normal joy of giving birth. I think it has a lot to do with losing Josiah 1-1/2 years ago. (To read my story, go to Jan. 2007 archives.) Today I was going through a bunch of stuff, and found the book I put together with all our memories of him. I just cried, of course. It's amazing how raw those feelings are even after this much time has gone by. I read through some e-mails & cards, but what got me most was my journaling. I am so thankful I wrote as much down as I did. It was such an amazing way to process things and grieve. Even reading through it all today was healing as I was able to see how I've grown through the experience and the time that has gone by. Aden has not replaced him by any means, and that was very obvious with my emotions today, but I am so thankful to have him in my arms. He is my sunshine behind the dark clouds I experienced for what seemed like a very long time and I praise God for him. He is another precious blessing from God!
One thing that I don't think will ever change is how difficult it is to answer when people ask me how many kids I have. I don't want to leave Josiah out of the bunch, as he is definitely one of my children, but sometimes it's still painful to bring up that I have 5 kids and then have to explain how we lost one. One thing I did have instilled even deeper into me is how each child is such a blessing from the Lord. No matter how long we have with them, no matter how difficult or easy they are, God has a plan for each one. I am thankful for each and every blessing he passes our way and am so eager to see God's faithfulness in their lives and see how He uses them for His kingdom purposes.
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